punk rock mom jeans

Aug 4

IM Conversation, 3:40-something pm

Gene Catman: Apparently Iceman is a deadbeat dad.

Erin: Really?
Where did you see that?

Gene Catman: tmz.

Erin: Oh god, is it on in the break room again?

Gene Catman: I saw it on their web site.

Erin: Um. What were you doing on TMZ’s web site?

Gene Catman: My injured eye* needs the gossipz.

* Gene Catman was recently the victim of biological plant warfare and looks like he was attacked by a cat that was not only angry, but also on fire.

Also, as a literate heterosexual male with a low tolerance for bullshittery, it is highly out of character for Gene Catman to even consider TMZ as a thing, let alone visit its site. He is clearly a sick man.